Is this where I’m supposed to write a sappy feminist post?
No? Okay. Good. That means y’all know me by now.
International Women’s Day is one of those observances I cringe a bit over because of my own opinions on equality vs. equity and my worldview.
Here’s the deal–I was raised with strong leaders. Women and men. Women that never used their gender as an excuse or a pass for advancement, or leverage for “more” in life. They worked for every opportunity, same as their male counterparts. The men, showed the same value in work, integrity, and diligence–and they treated women as their equals, advocated for their same level of opportunity, and were never threatened by them working at the same or higher level of advancement. These were my examples. How “modern” for the 80s.
In my faith walk, I’ve learned my place in biblical marriage. (Ohhhh…I think just heard a collective gasp around the world, LOL) Hear me out. If you think I’m a doormat for a second, wait for my husband to stop laughing and he’ll explain that one to you. I have my own opinions, my own decisions, and my own freedoms (including that of speaking, teaching, preaching, wearing jewelry, wearing my head uncovered, and any other Bible passage you would like to proof-text…come at me, bro). My husband is the spiritual head of our household, but that in no way is a means of control. Ever hear the joke that the wife is the neck and makes the head turn? We work together. And quite honestly, when it comes to matters of theology, scripture, and doctrine…that is totally my husband’s wheelhouse. Hand me the paperwork and administrative tasks any day of the week. We need each other.
At times I wonder if my views have done me a disservice, because I look around sometimes and just think, “instead of complaining so much about the problem, do something.” Perhaps it’s because I’ve spent years as a leader in position dominated by men for literally centuries, and come up against the good, bad, and ugly–some minds I’ve been able to change, and others that will never change (women included) and even going forward as a business owner, there’s always challenges that I will face as a woman in business–but see here’s the thing: I don’t use my gender as the excuse.
I will always work hard, seek answers, support, knowledge, and growth just as I always have to succeed because that’s what I’ve been taught to do to thrive as a leader. I just get to do it with pretty curls loose and a far better professional wardrobe now. I support women to reach for the stars, to better themselves, and to reach every opportunity in life. But I also take advantage of the male friends and allies in my corner too–there’s some smart cookies out there that I glean from in my own successes big and small.
At the end of the day, it comes down to this–we don’t exist in a vacuum and we never really know who need in life. We need each other. Love one another. Let’s celebrate what we ALL do.